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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25309699">Relief</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/kate7h/pseuds/kate7h'>kate7h</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>For Some Development - Thorfinn x Gudrid [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Vinland Saga (Manga)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Canon - Manga, Canon-Typical Gore, Chapter 158, F/M, Filler, Hugs, Missing Scene</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 02:00:23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,309</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25309699</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/kate7h/pseuds/kate7h</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>After his fight with Garm, Thorfinn spends the rest of the night searching through the dead on the battlefield, frantically looking for Gudrid and the others, worrying he’s too late. </p><p>Thorfinn’s POV of Chapter 158</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Gudrid/Thorfinn (Vinland Saga)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>For Some Development - Thorfinn x Gudrid [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1765357</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>22</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Relief</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I wrote this ages ago, so it’s kinda sad I’m only now getting around to posting it. Enjoy!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Thorfinn ran with all his might to the north gate, just where Hild had said the others had been the last she’d seen them. His side was throbbing painfully, feeling like it was burning, but he ignored it. Because of that lunatic kid, he’d been forced to leave Gudrid and the rest behind in the middle of a battlefield… he hated that that had been his best option. He’d meant to keep them close, save Gudrid from there as he’d initially intended, and leave this mess he wanted nothing to do with far behind him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And now he had no idea where Gudrid was. Or Sigurd, or anyone. At least he knew Baldr had been released into hands that would keep him safe, but that was more than could be said for Gudrid. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The battle was over though, the fighting having calmed to the quiet aftermath of war, of the putrid smell of blood and entrails and the sounds of scavengers already picking the bodies apart— be they birds of prey or fellow looting vikings. It made no difference. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He ran quickly through the grass, stomach churning as he scanned the bodies strewn around, searching for a blue tunic and short, dark hair…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Gudrid!” He shouted, seeing the bridge they’d tried to escape from before. It was littered with the carcasses of horses and men. He marched forward, searching for a singular woman, all the while dreading it. “Gudrid!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hild shouted behind him, but he barely heard. His eyes widened as he caught a glimpse of a silver cross shining in the moonlight. His chest tightened as he ran forward to the mound of bodies covering whomever the cross belonged to. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please no, please…” he muttered, kneeling in the blood soaked dirt as he yanked on the bodies, pulling them out of the way. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not the same cross, right?” Hild said, sounding as unsure as he felt. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know,” he shook, lifting another man out of the way. </span>
  <em>
    <span>This foolish war… why did you all have to kill each other for such a stupid war? </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Please don’t take Gudri with you… </span>
  </em>
  <span>He hadn’t known her very long, but she was such a person that filled the space between the quiet, energetic and kind. She always went out of her way to talk with him and just smile and have fun. He cared for her. To see her get caught up in all this death and despair, knowing it was his fault… he despised it. She deserved better from the world. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hild pulled the last man out of the way, revealing the owner of the cross. They both breathed a sigh of relief as they looked down on a bearded man, his jaw crooked in an unnatural way. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The man with the chain,” Hild said. “He was on the side of your relative. Perhaps he brought Gudrid with him to their camp.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Thorfinn swallowed, standing up once more. “I hope so…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His eyes scanned the ground up to the gate. The fortress, sealed up so tightly not a couple hours ago, was wide open. The gates were busted out, guards either dead or long abandoned their posts. He stepped over the scattered bodies across the bridge, searching for anything that would indicate where she’d gone from there. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Gudrid…” he muttered, feeling the apprehension in his stomach. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thorfinn,” Hild called.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He turned to see her lifting a ladle up from the ground. Thorfinn walked over to her, recognizing it as the tool she’d accidentally used to hold Baldr hostage. He took it from Hild’s extended hand. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It was on the bridge,” Hild said. “It was the last place I saw them. If their bodies aren’t here, it’s likely they were able to escape.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Thorfinn’s stomach didn’t feel any easier, but he hoped that logic would prove sound. He stepped to the edge of the bridge, looking down at the canal underneath. He traced the water flow out from the fortress to the waterway… which led right to Thorkell’s base. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He turned to see the sun beginning to rise over the trees. </span>
  <em>
    <span>We’ve been searching all night… </span>
  </em>
  <span>With a shaky sigh, he dropped his shoulders. “Let’s go check the base. If they’re not there, then we’ll keep looking out here.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hild simply nodded, her eyes scanning the bodies strewn about once more. He didn’t wait for her to finish before he took off running across the field. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His side was agonizing, but he pushed forward, ignoring it. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Please be there, Gudri. Please… please be alright. </span>
  </em>
  
</p><p>
  <span>The stench of blood didn’t decrease in the slightest as he approached the camp. It was just fresh blood from survivors, rather than the ones on the battlefield already beginning to decay. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There were wounded lined up beyond what his eyes could see. He bit his lip, not halting in his search. If she was here, it was likely she’d be among these. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Gudrid!” He shouted once more, making his way through the groaning and wails. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It took far too long… far too long to search each row. She was just one person, and there were just too many wounded. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shit,” he growled, bracing a hand against his side, leaning against a wagon briefly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hild looked at him, her gaze cold. “Is it bleeding again?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Thorfinn shook his head, although he wasn’t sure of the answer. It hadn’t bled through his clothes yet, if it was. Either way, that wasn’t important. He needed to find-</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He stopped, looking across the way. He could see a slight figure kneeling over one of the wounded… </span>
  <em>
    <span>Blue tunic, short dark hair…</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>His chest tightened and he broke out in a run before Hild could get a word out, before he could even really think. He ignored the pain. He just had to make sure… make sure beyond all doubt… that she was okay. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Gudrid!” He shouted once more with a hoarse voice, watching the woman kneeling on the ground. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>To his relief, she turned, and he could see her face. Those same bright eyes and perpetually pink cheeks, full of life.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She looked around in confusion until her eyes settled on him as he fast approached where she was kneeling. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thorfinn! Hild!” She called, getting up as he slowed to a stop. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He huffed in his breaths heavily, the pain in his side making it a little harder to breathe now. But she was safe. She was alive. In his mind, he’d been running through the possibilities of finding her out in that battlefield… her body broken and her face cold and pale for a war she had no rhyme or reason to ever be near. And it would’ve been entirely his fault... Gudrid’s blood added to his already stained hands. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And he’d never get to see her smile again…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But here she was, perfectly fine without a single scratch. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thank goodness,” he breathed, leaning forward as he braced his hands against his knees, trying to catch his breath. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Were you looking for us all this time?” She said, rushing over to him as he tried to get his breathing under control. She reached out, as if trying to help but unsure of what to do. </span>
  <em>
    <span>She’s so damn good… to think I almost lost her… </span>
  </em>
  <span>“Sigurd was wounded, so we had to attend to his wounds first…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She didn’t get a chance to finish her sentence before Thorfinn stood upright and placed his hands against her shoulders. She blinked, looking up in confusion. But he was just so relieved, he wasn’t thinking anymore. All he could think was to never let her go, and never let any of these idiot vikings lay a hand on her ever again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>With a sigh, he brought her into him, wrapping his arms around her fully as he held her tight. His fingers threaded through her hair as he buried his face in her shoulder, taking her in as he felt her heartbeat against his. He felt her stiffen, but he selfishly held on a few moments longer, letting it sink in that she was well and truly fine. She was so warm… so alive. After such a night, picturing this wonderful woman being ripped from the world all the while, to hold her in his arms was beyond what he could describe. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m so glad,” he smiled, squeezing her just a bit tighter. “I’m so glad that you’re safe… I’m really glad.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ah-!” Gudrid sputtered against him. “Y- yes- Sorry…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Thorfinn gave her one last squeeze before pulling away again, although he really just wanted to hang onto her and make sure she didn’t disappear once more, and to hang on to this feeling of utter relief holding her gave him. He hoped he wasn’t making her too uncomfortable… He released her shoulder and moved off toward the others still on the ground. Sigurd was the one who was wounded, and he wanted to assess his state as well. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How’s Sigurd?” He asked Sigurd’s thane. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s pretty bad,” he said, his face grave. “He’s conscious, but it seems he can’t move.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Thorfinn felt that same guilt and anxiety in his guts. </span>
  <em>
    <span>He can’t move… </span>
  </em>
  <span>A paralysis like that was grave indeed. And Sigurd was, like Gudrid, someone who really had no reason to be involved in all this had it not been for Thorfinn. Whatever damages which happened to him, blame should be primarily attributed to Thorfinn. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sig, Thorfinn’s here,” the thane said quietly. When Sigurd said nothing, he continued. “Sig?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He leaned back once more, “Maybe he’s asleep.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Thorfinn bit his lip, watching the man’s back rise and fall with his breaths. </span>
  <em>
    <span>At least he’s alive, </span>
  </em>
  <span>but those wounds were severe. It was uncertain he would fully recover from them. He felt a shameful amount of relief at that… if Sigurd was wounded enough to go back to Iceland, then he couldn’t chase Gudrid anymore. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Of course, he didn’t want Sigurd to be irreparably injured… but he didn’t want him to force Gudrid to be his wife when she didn’t want that. He wanted Gudrid to stay with them as much as she wanted to stay. She was such a joy, and she was fun to be around. At times, she made him feel like a kid, being silly together and goofing off with Karli like they hadn’t a care in the world. Despite everything they’d already gone through, the journey was just barely beginning. He couldn’t imagine it without her now. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’re you going to do from here on?” Thorfinn asked. “It’ll be troublesome to keep having you tail us…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’ll be going back to Iceland,” the man said, and Thorfinn felt that selfish relief once more. But before he could respond, the thane continued. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Gudrid promised Sig that she’d go back with him.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He blinked, looking at Sigurd’s man with startlement. </span>
  <em>
    <span>...What?</span>
  </em>
  
</p><p>
  <span>He whipped his head around to where Gudrid was standing a ways off, her back to him. “Is that true, Gudrid?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She hesitated, which just made the sinking feeling in his stomach worse. “...Yeah… I did… promise…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Thorfinn gaped at her, not wanting to believe it, an icy feeling seeping down his spine. </span>
  <em>
    <span>What about the freedom you wanted? What about Greece? What about Karli? You… can’t leave now… </span>
  </em>
  <span>None of these words came out. For a moment he wasn’t sure if he could breathe. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Why can’t I be allowed to choose a life for myself…?” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Her words that fateful night rang in his ears, and he remembered the tears that streamed down her cheeks, and the utterly defeated expression on her bruised face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He started to walk forward, ready to run with her now. Ready to grab Einar and Leif (and to carry Leif as gently as he could, if he had to) to make sure Gudrid didn’t have to go through with this. </span>
  <em>
    <span>I won’t let her be trapped! I won’t!</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He tread towards her, “Gud-“</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Master Thorfinn!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He blinked, turning to see Eskil and a company of Jomsvikings marching up to him. He frowned, watching them. </span>
  <em>
    <span>What now…</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Here are the Jomsvikings chieftain’s signature cape and sword. Please accept them at once,” Eskil said before bowing, and thus the rest of their company bowed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I now proclaim that from today henceforth, you are the fourth chieftain of the Jomsvikings.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Thorfinn couldn’t help the glare that settled on his face. </span>
  <em>
    <span>All the times I told them I’m not interested… they go off and fight a war, and now they’re forcing this on me… </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dammit,” he growled. This was probably the worst timing of all. Thankfully Sigurd was wounded and they couldn’t leave immediately. He ground his teeth as Gudrid and Sigurd’s thane looked on in astonishment. He sighed as he considered his options. If he turned away, they’d just bring him back, surely. Not one of these idiotic warriors had listened to him at the beginning of this whole mess. Why would they start now? But surely it would be ludicrous to accept…. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Unless…</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He sighed, scowling at the kneeling crowd. Then he stepped forward, ignoring the sword entirely as he took the cloak and wrapped it around himself. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“T- Thorfinn?!” Gudrid called out, obviously startled, but he couldn’t explain right now. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Gudrid,” he said as he laced the clasp at his neck. “Don’t go anywhere just yet.” His voice was sharp as he looked at her, then sent a piercing stare at the thane. He could see the man visibly swallow. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Good. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wait for me,” he said, turning to her once more, letting his worry and sincerity show on his face. “I won’t be long.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her eyes were wide as she gaped at him, biting her lip as confusion remained on her face. Still she nodded, giving him her trust— something he truly didn’t deserve, but was grateful for regardless. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>With that, he turned and walked away with the company of men. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you for reading! I appreciate it! Please please leave a comment&lt;3 I’m so grateful</p></blockquote></div></div>
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